CHILD ABUSE BEGINS WITH CIRCUMCISION

A Note From The Webmaster:

I have read this article very thoroughly over and over and I agree with every word this author has to say. All remarks highlighted in RED are remarks and experiences that I have personally felt myself.

Ted Pong  

If you believe men an women should have rights to their own bodies and the freedom to choose for themselves whether or not to join any religion, cult or social medical fad which requires bodily mutilation, you may want to help speak out against the sexual abuse of children and infant genital mutilation.

I am a victim of infant circumcision, and my feelings of personal violation, pain, anger, and outrage are deep and intense. I am not alone. I speak for thousands of other men now beginning to awaken to the full impact of that which was inflicted on us at the tenderest, most open, sensitive, needy, and helpless period of our lives.

Many women suffer serious emotional problems because of incest or rape in early childhood, remembered, or buried and forgotten. My heart goes out to these women, and I will never minimize their pain; yet when such incidents are discovered, these women have the benefit of counseling and support from many sources, and society is rightfully outraged at injuries which often stop short of permanent physical mutilation.

Every man circumcised in infancy suffers similar emotional abuse, accompanied by permanent physical mutilation, disfigurement, and impaired function, at an age even more vulnerable, open, and sensitive, regardless of whether or not he is willing to admit it.

Now it is time that our cry of pain and anguish be heard. It is time that the apathy and denial of mainstream American society be shaken. It is time for someone to stand and say NO to the continued practice of sexual abuse, mutilation. and disfigurement of baby boys in a modern civilized nation!

CIRCUMCISION: THE PAIN AND THE TRAUMA
Autobiographical Sketch

Ted Pong

Warm sun, a clear lake, a few cooling breezes, trees, flowers, friendly creatures here and there, -- feel yourself gliding smoothly, erotically in a light canoe, or maybe wading or swimming lazily. Suddenly the lake transforms into solid glass shattering at the same time, shattering around your body, through your body, driving into your heart, throat, head, the very center of your brain stem, - it is grinding, crunching, never ending horror increasing into eternity.

This is a circumcision, my circumcision, in a word picture to convey a complex of feelings. It was shortly after I was born, June 21, 1936. Was it hours or days? I do not know. I think perhaps minutes, or an hour or two. The details of the memory are not clear. There is little clarity of sight or hearing of the physical reality, only a chaotic miasma of horror and pain beyond category pain, and helpless powerlessness to do anything about the terrible attack on my penis.

My circumcision was not "botched" job, at least not from the viewpoint that there is such a thing as a "normal" or proper circumcision. There are normal, proper, nice human sacrifices, and there are normal proper, nice, state sanctioned executions by lethal injections, electrocution, gassing, hanging, shooting, stoning, beheading, burning, pressing, impaling, flaying (alive), dismembering (slowly) and the like, and so called "botched" ones. So my circumcision was a normal, proper, nice one.

The nightmares recur for years, eight, nine, ten years old, the theme always the same, lovely erotic liquid smoothness, flowing life, a new universe, suddenly transformed to the shattering, grinding, crunching horror. The specific dreams varied widely, but the feeling content was unmistakable.

There was no clue to the explanation at the time or at anytime during my entire life, until I finally got into the circumcision memory itself. Then and only then did the entire horror fall into place.

I can only speculate on how many men have suffered unexplainable recurring nightmares in early childhood. How many of these are actually unidentified circumcision trauma? The specific content of the dreams may seem totally unrelated to circumcision. Only a very small number of men I know have had nightmares that were easily identifiable as circumcision trauma, such as dreams about being strapped down by giant monsters who cut off their penises.

The pain is unbelievable. So nobody does believe it, except a few men who have relived the memory of their own circumcisions, and a few sensitive souls who have seen circumcisions and seen through the false appearances of tranquility in those cases where the baby went into comatose shock from the unbearable pain, or lapsed into a drunken stupor sucking on the wine attacking his brand new super-sensitive central nervous system.

Words of pain and horror cannot describe the reality. What words of pleasure and rapture can give reality or meaning to emotions and sensations of sexual love for an intelligent alien with non-sexual biology?

Babies feel no pain. Four short words so cruel and false they make the blood run cold, but they fall from the lips of many doctors and nurses in hospitals, as well as mohels (Jewish ritual circumcisers) bragging about their personal "experience and technique", whenever circumcision is mentioned, and they express an age old attitude that babies and children are not people but chattels, to be loved or exploited, nurtured or abused, as whim, fashion, tradition, or religion dictate.

The truth is babies and children are people with human rights to whole bodies. The truth is babies are more sensitive to pain than adults or older children.

Not many men have recovered the memory of infant circumcision. If they did, circumcision religious and secular would end tomorrow.

Having relived the horror of my own circumcision, I know I must dedicate my life to bringing an end to this practice and to helping as many other circumcised men as possible come to terms with their pain and horror. Unfortunately the latter is not easy. Circumcised men usually think that they have no problems, let alone pain and horror, and many have been led to believe they are better off circumcised.

The general effects of circumcision I have noticed seem to be sexual anxiety and hostility toward women that is difficult for the individual to detect and identify as such. He just acts it out and thinks his attitude and behavior are normal. He is unaware of his own pain and anxiety, because he has never known otherwise. He does not stop to consider the physical fact that every circumcised man is lacking 50% to 70% of the pleasure sensitive nerve endings on his penis with which he was endowed at birth, nerve endings designed for sexual pleasure, his birthright as a human being. But the heart knows, and the loss is felt, and there is pain, and fear, and anger.

My son Shu Yuen completed his helicopter commercial pilot and instructor ratings the first week of November 1992, then celebrated his 21 st birthday on the 17th. In 1971 when he was born, routine circumcision of baby boys was at an all time high in American hospitals. At the time I had no idea that circumcision was so great an evil. I had little thought about it at all, one way or another.

So was Shu circumcised?

No. He is happily intact and whole today. I was already a long time student of metaphysics and natural health by 1970. Shu's mother Linda and I took pains that he was left intact and not circumcised. I was aware then that circumcision was unnatural, but for all the years while Shu was growing up, it still never occurred to me that I might have been hurt by the operation.

I was in denial, exactly like so many young athletic men I meet today. To them it is unthinkable that they could possibly be anything but perfectly healthy physical supermen, especially sexually.

For 30 years of my adult life, my brother Alex would ask me at least two ore three times a year with real feeling and compassion, "Ted why do you hate women so much?" Always I would answer with the same sincere hurt amazement. "Me, I don't hate women. I love women."

It is an interesting coincidence that Alex is intact. The doctor was out of town when he was born in 1940, and my mother never did follow up to have him circumcised later. She merely grumbled about the stupid irresponsible substitute doctor who would not circumcise. Alex has been happily married for nearly 30 years, has one son, four daughters and three grandchildren.

After Shu was born Linda and I separated. I continued on my misogynistic way, fell into a marriage in 1981 that made my problems with Linda seem like heaven on earth, and divorced in 1986, desperate, broke, broken, and lonely. I had to face myself and start healing, or finish the hellish death of emotional disintegration already well started.

From 1986 to 1990 I went through a four year healing process of self searching and meditation that worked miraculous changes within me. In 1990 I began to give spiritual healing and counseling a full time occupation and helped many others achieve remarkable results.

Not until 1991 however, did I begin to get into the horror of my own circumcision memory I am still dealing with it.  Some men report intense fear and guilt with the circumcision memory. I never felt much guilt with my memory. Fear yes. Pain yes. Overwhelming and incredible. But it was anger that I felt more than guilt.

Guilt and low self esteem dominated my childhood for many reasons. I was a sad, unhappy boy, with a passionate hatred for school from kindergarten through college. The hidden pain and terror of my circumcision reinforced that guilt and fear more than I would have ever guessed before raising the memory. Nevertheless when the memory actually surfaced, anger took over. Anger from my 1991 perspective cleansed my guilt and fear and drove out the sadness and loneliness I felt deeply from 1986 to 1990.

Anger is a pallid euphemism for what I felt. More accurate would be overwhelming fury, rage, and desire for vengeance, desire to torture, main, and utterly destroy any human being how ever had anything to do with performing, ordering, or requesting circumcisions, or who even thought about circumcision and "health benefit" in the same context.

I am still dealing with these feelings as I dedicate my life to ending infant circumcision the ultimate child sexual abuse.